High Definition New Years Resolution

Crippling anxiety issues are a constant companion, but like everyone I have good days and bad. On a particularly good day I was able to draw myself out of the house and go to help a friend of mine celebrate her birthday. She is bit of a social butterfly, at least far more so than I am, so there were bunches of people I didn't know and I was twitchy but over all very happy to be out of the house. I was nearly ready to bolt after a drunk lady asked if I was someone's husband while I was washing my hands in the bathroom, but I had already ordered food so I sat back down.

This friend of mine, you have to understand something about her, there are few people I know that I have more respect for. She is smart, well read, hard working and she's gotten far on her own merits and hard work and is set to just keep going farther.So imagine my surprise when she brings up that she reads my crappy little blog. Not only that she reads it, but she thinks its good.

Normally my anxiety and self doubt would just make me believe she was just saying it to be kind. Either it was because I was having a good day or it was because she brought it up without prompting but for some reason I was able to just take the compliment at face value. When I told her I've been working on a book about my life that is basically one long blog post she said, "I'd read that."

I am not big on new years resolutions. Twelve years ago I resolved to transition and every year since then my resolution has been, "just keep going." This year though, with some encouragement from my friends, I am going to resolve to take this blog and my writing more seriously. If there are actually people who want to hear my voice I can at least try not to be so quiet.

This blog will now be paired with my brand new tumblr. Tumblr has a far less intimidating format and I think it will lend itself to more frequent but shorter posts. Long form posts will show up here and there and I will actually try can come up with some for of writing schedule and keep to it. Some of the the older posts may get copy pasta-ed over to tumblr as well.

No promises, I am very nervous about letting people read anything I write, especially when it is so personal, but I will try my best to get a final draft of my book done this year and get it to some people who have agreed to help me edit it.

Thank you all for your support. I'll try to stay feeling good, and try to discipline myself to work through the times when I am not, because you never know when an unexpected, and much needed, boost is coming your way.

Happy New Year *crosses fingers*